Contributed by: Fantasy X, Dian Street
I will never forget the moment this girl asked me why am I volunteering for Positive Action Foundation Philippines, Incorporated (PAFPI). She assumed that I am not an HIV positive individual and that I am not an affected family member either. But when I told her that I am a client and that I was diagnosed last May 29, 2013 at Manila Social Hygiene Clinic, I saw how surprised she was.
After that conversation, we made it a point to share countless moments of laughter and endless jokes every time we cross our paths. I wonder if there’s a reason behind her smile. I suddenly had the urge to ask her about it. And here’s her story.
This is my first time to deliver a testimony about my HIV status in front of several unfamiliar faces since I was diagnosed. It feels like I am transported back to a time wherein I am lying on a bed and some of the patients near me were slowly dying. I’ll never forget how life consumed each and every soul beside me. I can hardly see the difference between what I went through on that situation and the feeling I have right now. The similarity is so uncanny that it gave me chills just thinking about it.
Contributed by: Renee (Malate, Manila: April 7, 2014)
Image Source: rayannesthoughts.blogspot.com
I was given the opportunity to share my story to several doctors, midwives and nurses for a Tuberculosis and HIV Collaboration Seminar in Angeles, Pampanga last week. By the time I entered the venue I have no idea what to expect since that was only my second time to disclose about my situation. I was nervous and shaking. One doctor even asked me to keep it natural and relaxed.
It feels like I’m about to dive deep in the middle of an ocean full of sharks about to devour my soul. The speaker gave a signal and I joined the participants who were seated in a circular manner. All I saw was their eyes looking at me and waiting for my first few words. I almost choked on my own words, but felt as if I’ve been doing this for a long time as I continue to utter the phrases I needed.
There is no level at which I can describe the elation of disclosing my status as an HIV positive individual to several people I have never met before. I remember the time when I denied all allegations about me being HIV positive. Looking back at myself and comprehending my journey made me realize how clueless I was back then about HIV or AIDS. All my fears flushed down the toilet as they were replaced by an emerging feeling of confidence and strength to continue living a positive and normal life.